Boogeyman

With a January 2005 full of horror movies released every weekend, February continues the tradition starting with Boogeyman, perhaps the most anticipated one (after a well received trailer last year), and perhaps the worst of them all (hey, at least Alone in the Dark had tits they tell me).

I always complain about horror movies, and I liked them only if they follow at least one of my rules: adult language, gore, nudity and it has to keep me glued to the screen, scared to know what's going to happen next.
I'm sorry to say that Boogeyman had none of that, but it also has bad acting, horrible camera work, and yes, like many these days, a final part that doesn't make sense.

It's the story of a little kid called Tim Jensen, who opens the movie going to bed, and getting scared by things in his room. His father comes to help him get to sleep, and after some verbal exchange about the Boogeyman, who terrifies little Tim, the father goes into the closet, then camera moves and shakes a lot and he's taken by the Boogeyman. This is the only kind of scary scene in the whole movie. You can leave after it and be happy that you saw the only worthy scene in the movie.

Fifteen years pass and we have Tim as a young adult, played by Barry Watson (WB star from 7th Heaven), he's been scared of the Boogeyman since the episode with his father happened and he's still even afraid to go into closets.
He's in the city, and his uncle calls him to let him know that his mother has died, she'd been really bad since the father disappearance which by the way they all think he just left Tim and his mother, because of course the Boogeyman doesn't exists. Or does he?
Tim must go back to his childhood house now, where it all happened, and face his fears.
He'll find his uncle there, his old girlfriend from years ago, and his current girlfriend goes too.

From here on the movie plays with us making us jump at every move the characters do. They open a door, they look up, they turn around, etc, whatever they do, we get the scary sound and the wind blowing. Also, there are no lights at all most of the time. It seems they didn't have much money to pay for electricity or something cause even when they turn on the lights in a room, it never enlightens the whole room, just parts of it, leaving the rest of it in shades.

Oh yeah, that Boogeyman? The first time we see him is around the ending, and it's a disaster. He's on screen maybe for 60 seconds total, and it's not scary at all. It's a guy with a CGI face and he moves very quick so we can't see him properly. Horrible special effects too.

Barry Watson is fine, I'd even say pretty good, but the rest of the actors are really bad. We see the uncle for just a few minutes and he sucks. The two girls are pretty bad too, but they're really hot, so it would all be forgiven with just a tit shown but no, the WB crowd wouldn't approve so lets keep this PG-13, so the movie is not a horror movie anymore, but at least they'll get their money back on opening weekend.